Friday, September 25, 2009

Finding Time To Write

Quit looking for time to write. Just pick up your laptop (or notebook) or sit at your desk and START!

Here's what happened when my husband Robert tried to plan time to write. Our 3 year old daughter wanted to play in the bath. He got the bath ready for her and then brought the laptop with him to type whle she bathed and still be able to keep an eye on her safety.

Our 6 year old daughter realized a bath was being had and quickly joined her sister. Fighting, playing and splashing ensued. Robert got no actual writing done and instead had to cut their bath short and get them ready for bed.

He read them their bedtime story and then opened up the laptop again. He made a crucial mistake; he was on the bed when he opened the laptop. A while later, when I brought a coffee up to him, I found him fast asleep. No writing had been done during the two hours he'd spent upstairs.

I know that finding time to write when you have family and other obligations can be really difficult. But don't we all owe it to ourselves to try? (At least Robert TRIED!)


Welcome! said...

So. First. I have to formally apologize for never thoroughly reading your blog to notice you live in England! Second. I have a short story to tell you. I have this friend. Nope. I have the BEST friend anyone could ask for. And she's having a difficult time right now. Why you ask? In a nutshell, her mother, Mary, is from England, her father from the States. They met at Uni in Cypress and married. They had 3 beautiful children but divorced when Anne was 5. Anne's dad has a top level civilian security job with...well it's a secret. Noone knows. He travels to different military bases around the world and my guess is the CIA. Anne never really knew him until she finished school and married which is only a couple of years ago. (I'm getting to the point, promise.) A little tidbit I left out was, Anne's mom went to nursing school in England where she met a wonderful young man in medical school. They became very close and he even asked her to marry him. Shortly after, Mary's mother died and Mary didn't handle it very well. She broke the relationship off and moved to Cypress to further her nursing education to become a midwife, where she met Anne's dad. I should add that during their marriage they moved back to England where Anne and her siblings were born, eventually landing in Minnesota just a short time before the divorce. Mary spent the next 20 years raising her children by herself, completely devoted to them. She never dated! (Now the juicy part...) Mr. Medical School in England had almost the exact same life. He married but stayed in England, had 3 children, yet stayed married to his wife until roughly 5 years ago. And what does Mr. Medical School do? He gets on a reunion website sponsored by the Nursing School Mary attended and found someone who thought they knew where Mary was. They re-connected and had a long distance relationship before he finally flew Mary back to England for a visit. It was the beginning of a fairytale romance. Mary was smitten. Old feelings returned and she started flying out every second or third week. After 3 years of this, Mr. Medical School went to his mother and his children to pour out his heart about his love for her and his intention of asking Mary to marry him. And you know what happened? (Keep reading below...Those Google freaks would't let me post the whole thing...)

Welcome! said...

......His mother got up, walked to her bedroom to return a short while later with a box in her hand. So distraught after the break-up 30 years prior, Mr. Medical School gave the ENGAGEMENT RING to his mother for safe keeping and she kept it all those years. (Now long story short, I promise...) Imagine Mary's surprise when he proposed with the same exact ring! Well this summer, our family vacation wasn't spent going on a cruise or Disney. It was spent traveling 14 hours with our best friends to watch this sweet couple officially tie the knot after 30 years. "So why is Anne upset," you ask?
Mr. Medical School never left England. He has a prominent practice and his three children are a bit younger than Anne and her siblings. All of Mary's family is still in England. Though she's lived in Minnesota for 20 or so years, they have no family. Anne and her sister moved down to Tennessee where I live, to be close to their fathers' family. Anne's brother went off to the military, leaving Mary alone. Her kids are grown, why not move home where her new husband and all her family is? Anne is devastated, although when I talked to her today I asked her what the difference will be? Since Anne moved down here 6 years ago, she's probably visited or been visited by her mom 20 times. She says just the thought of "adding numbers" to the phone number makes her sad. (Did I mention she and her husband are trying to have their 2nd baby and she's a bit, aaahhhemmmm, emotional?) Extra numbers?? Geez...On our really long ride home from Minnesota, we discussed our next "blended family" vacation and how it was obviously going to be to visit her mom and Gary in England. We even daydreamed, and okay...(actually sold our houses here and all furniture in them IN OUR HEADS and discussed what our 2 cottages on the same land out in the country was going to look like. My daughter got really really excited because she is only 11, but dreams HUGE by talking about attending Oxford for the past 2 years. I, by the way, told her she better plant a money tree in those dreams she's having to help fund the bill, to which she replied, "Why? I'm going to get scholarships for everything." Do I have an over achiever or what?
Soooo, I've told you all this in hopes that you can give me some words of encouragement. Some good sound advice to persuade her this move isn't as bad as she thinks. Do you still have family in California? How do you handle raising your kids so far away from family? Your family, I mean. I love her so much and just don't know how to make her feel better. My mom passed away a couple of years ago, so my thought process isn't as sympathetic as it should be. I find myself constantly wanting to say, "Uh Hello? Atleast you CAN call your mom." But that's not very empathetic or sympathetic now is it?
Hello? Are you asleep? Okay, just checking. I have almost the same amount of children as you (albeit, I only gave birth to 3 of the 6) I am still exhausted at the end of the day and would probably have fallen asleep in the midst of this FREAKING NOVEL by some stranger!!
Okay, I'm stopping. Write me back when you wake up!!! By the way, I had an epiphany, so if you read this love story on my blog later, don't be alarmed. I'm not plagarizing myself. I gave myself permission first!!!